Busy, busy, busy

Hi all, as the title to this blog indicates....we've been busy, busy, busy. We are in full-blown basketball mode. Cedric is not only coaching JV boys basketball again this season but, we also have 2 boys of our own playing that he is coaching as well. I could go into a whole other blog explaining the emotion and stress that he's shared with me about coaching his own sons. I won't though and will leave that for him to maybe soon share himself on his own blog (hint hint).
Ty was asked to join the 4th/5th grade boys at CSD again this season. In all fairness to him, we did offer for him to play with a hearing team this season instead. His response-no way! He wanted to play with is friends at CSD again this season. I'm sure the fact that they went undefeated last season may have swayed him some....or maybe it's just that he really has made friends with the boys on the team. By the way, the "Runnin' Rebels" are off to a great start this season. I have seen growth and improvement in all the players since last season.
I can not stress enough how grateful we are that Jaden is a student at CSD. Aside from providing for him a superior education, he is also able to participate in sports with his Deaf peers and Deaf coaches. His first experience was t-ball last season in Kindergarten. This basketball season he is playing on a co-ed basketball team with his Deaf friends, all which are from his 1st grade class. Cedric and another dad are coaching, both coaches are hearing. I'll be honest in saying that I do wish that one of the coaches was Deaf. It's obvious that there is a communication disadvantage for both the players and the coaches. Cedric and I were discussing this after Saturday's game and both agreed that we feel the kids do deserve a Deaf coach. We feel comfortable being a support to the team, to the players, and to a coach, but don't feel that it's in the kids best interest to take the place of head coach. However, the "Starfish" team is really fun to watch and play with so much emotion and eagerness. I laugh the whole game through and get a real kick out of watching these little guys chase the ball around the court with nothing on their minds but stealing that ball and getting into the basket!
We did have our first upset while at Jaden's game this past weekend. Mind you, Jaden loves basketball. It's in his blood. He has told me that he enjoys watching the high school boys at CSD play and practice so he can learn from them and copy them. His dad is a coach so I suppose you can call him a gym rat. He enjoys playing coach on the sideline of Ty's games and is eager to tell the referee when he misses a foul! He is very mindful while he is on the court during a game and makes sure that his teammates are okay. Which is why he had a meltdown at this last game. After dribbling the ball down the court, he stopped and had his back to the player that was guarding him. He went to pivot and had his elbows up holding the ball...just as he has seen and knows to do. As he went to pivot, the boy guarding him got knocked onto the floor and although he wasn't hurt, he was crying and taken off the court. Jaden seemed to be unsure whether or not he really hurt the boy and if what happened was serious or not. Within a few seconds he walked over to the boy that was not sitting on the bench to tell him sorry. I think at that moment Jaden felt embarrassed and also responsible for hurting the boy. He hid his face against his dad and started sobbing. He wouldn't make eye contact with anyone, not even the little boy who he accidentally knocked over who came to tell him that he was ok and not hurt and that he was sorry. He even asked how to sign "ok" to Jaden. The game was then over and like the great parents that they are, Jaden's teammates parents all came up to him to tell him what a great job he did during the game and how fouls happen in all sports, accidents happen, and how they look forward to next weeks game.
This leads me to my next blog. As I reflected on the incident as we drove home after the game, I couldn't help but feel some inadequacy in my ability to communicate with my Deaf son. Don't get me wrong, after he was done wiping his tears and snot into my sweater while he was hiding his face, I consoled him. I told him that it was an accident, that I was proud of him for showing good sportsmanship and telling the boy sorry. That this happens in all sports and that even adults make fouls like this when playing sports. I'm sure I got the point across and I know he understood me yet when I see the other parents communicating with him I desire so badly to be able to communicate with my son in that same way....deep conversation and not basic chat, to fully explain instead of fumbling with generic signs, to not hold him back in any way because of me not being fluent in ASL. During that car ride home a question that I ponder quite frequently...why God, did you bless our family with our dear Jaden and not a Deaf family where he wouldn't ever experience the things he has and does with our hearing family?
All I know is this....God knew that no other family would love this beautiful little boy in the same way that we do. I guess you can say that our family had a "Jaden-shaped" hole and God knew exactly what He was doing when He decided that our family would be perfect for Jaden and Jaden perfect for us. We've learned that we are not alone in raising Jaden and that the CSD community, the Deaf community, are along side us and Jaden each step of the way.

One day at a time...that's all we can do.